Get Out | Microfiction

Edward Lear arguing couple illustration - "Get Out" flash fiction


“I’m going.”

“Right now.”

“I said I’m going!”

She scowls. “Go faster.”

“Why should I?”

“Because I told you, you arsehole. Get away with you!”

His shoulders sag. “Stop screaming at me.”

“I won’t stop screaming until you leave this house.”

“I just –”


“I need –”


“But I –”

“No ifs, no buts – out!”

“Goddammit, woman, I need my wallet!”

“…Oh.” She retrieves the lost item from the hallway table, which happens to be right in his line of sight. “It’s here, you idiot.”

He snatches the wallet with a surly “Thank you.”

“Now piss off!”

“I am.”

“Not fast enough.”

He opens the door and steps out into the street. He gives her one last look. “Bye then.”

“Bye,” she says. Her face softens at the sight of him. “Love you.”

“Could’ve fooled me.”

“You know what I’m like,” she says with a shrug. “I get a craving for apple pie and I have to have it. Immediately. It’s a curse.”

He rolls his eyes. “I know. And I love you too, you mad woman.”

She smiles for half a second, and then the scowl is back with a vengeance. “Now piss off to the supermarket, you bastard. And don’t forget the custard.”

Stories that Sing

I write one new story each week inspired by a random song from my Spotify library. This week it was “Love Her Madly” by The Doors.

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